HYA

I'm prepping for Bayani's deepfrying madness this weekend, so I was just fishing through a few pics that never made it into being full-on posts when I found this little gem.

After soaking this cube steak in hot sauce and buttermilk for a few days, I dropped it into the deepfryer. No big surprise there, really.

But you can't just have a chicken-fried steak by itself, right? So why not make a sandwich out of it, using cheddar-bacon mashed potatoes as a spread?

Why not, indeed.

Why I Do What I Do - The Steak and Egg Breakfast Wrap

I'll admit, I've been kind of slacking lately when it comes to the blog. But to be honest, I really haven't been making anything interesting lately. I mean, heck, I was going to post something yesterday about putting peanut butter on an Entenmann's chocolate-covered donut hole.


Delicious, yes, but not exactly worthy of its own post. I mean, what can I say about it? "PEANUT BUTTER ON DONUT NOM NOM NOM" isn't particularly compelling food writing.

That's all part of the problem, I suppose. In the last few weeks, I've been doing construction work - putting together sandwiches and wraps rather than actively cooking remotely complicated dishes. But there's something of value to talk about there, too. Take my breakfast, for example - a steak and egg wrap isn't really complicated, but there are bits and pieces that bear explanation.

Let's start with the choice of steak. Me, I went with skirt.


There's a reason skirt steak is generally viewed as the steak of choice when it comes to fajitas and other such wrap-like applications. Since it's so thin, it takes to marinades very well (mine consisted of teriyaki, Worcestershire, red wine vinegar, honey, Sriracha, and a dash of garlic powder) and cooks remarkably quickly (2:30 on each side on a 400+ degree skillet). The flavor is quite beefy, while the fat marbling and quick-melting connective tissue lead to a very toothsome, yet delicate texture. And since the grain of the meat goes side to side, it's ridiculously easy to cut it across the grain, leading to shorter meat fibers and therefore more tender mouth feel.


Amongst beef cuts, this quality is bested only by the tenderloin's similar grain pattern. But tenderloin's also generally three times as expensive as skirt, so I call whatevs on this one.

One of my biggest problems when it comes to creating wraps is estimating how much filler I need. Filler is that ingredient that provides bulk and texture to the wrap while offering little in the way of flavor. It tempers the more flavorful elements of the wrap, spreading it out across the breadth of the construct while simultaneously filling the stomach. It can be anything from rice to lettuce; in this case, it's fries. Why fries? Because whenever I order steak and eggs at a diner, I always swap out the home fries for fries fries. I like crunchy things.

But I digress. As I was saying, I always overshoot when it comes to the filler, which inevitably leads to overstuffing the wrap. In the end, I'm always stuck with a gigantic half-wrapped monstrosity that I can barely cram into my mouth (that's what she said), and that's never fun to eat.

The solution? Measure out your fries before you cook 'em.


Ta da! Perfect. No muss, no fuss. Into the fryer with 'em.

It's time to put the wrap together. First up, the steak.


Natural instinct would be to lay the steak out vertically, right? More visually appealing, easier to figure out the breadth of the wrap. So why am I laying the steak strips horizontally? The answer comes from thousands of frustrating steak wraps before. I'd bite down, and, no matter the tenderness of the steak, I'd wind up pulling away with an entire chunk of meat. This, of course, would mean the next few bites would be sadly meatless. By laying the steak out horizontally, each piece gets pulled away by each bite - no more struggling to tear off with each chomp.

Next on would be the fries.


Why put them on top of the steak, and not the other way around? The answer here is easy - the fries are sharp and pointy. The layer of steak under them keeps them from poking through the wrap itself. Nothing's sadder than a sandwich or wrap with poor structural integrity.

And finally, the egg.


Why over easy rather than sunny side? Here, we're using the pokiness of the fries to our advantage. The fries will pierce the yolk, freeing the yolky goodness into the interior of the wrap, where it can be soaked up by the potatoey fries rather than run down the inside of the wrap itself. Even distribution of the yolk is key, since it's effectively the sauce. And since the side facing up has seen the majority of the heat, it's just tough enough to shield that side of the wrap from the wicked spears of crispy potato.

The end result is a delight to eat. The fries capture and hold the yolk, preventing it from running out the bottom of the wrap, while each bite delivers a careful balance of steak, egg, and potato. Because that's how we do. Don't just be delicious when it comes to your eats, folks. Be smart about it, too.

I Made A Salad Today

That's right. I know I have a reputation for just making colossally unhealthy (yet delicious) things. Many of you were quite recently at my much-touted Rock and Roll Fryathon, in fact. But I just want to let you know, gentle readers, that I'm still capable of making things like this:


That, my friends, is a spinach and apple salad with sliced mushrooms and grape tomatoes in a dijon, honey, and red wine vinaigrette. It's topped with gorgonzola, toasted hazelnuts, and still-hot herb-rubbed sirloin, and served with three honkin' huge muenster-parmesan croutons.

Now don't tell anyone. I've got a reputation to uphold.

Steak at Peter Luger

That's right, you read it correctly. Peter Luger. The granddaddy of all steakhouses. Now, I understand some of you will read that, and say something like "Oh, I don't know. I've been to Outback." To those people, I ask a simple favor - find yourself a sturdy wrench, then beat yourself about the head and neck with it.

Steak is something special; a meal so simple that it holds so many pitfalls and traps for the uncautious cook. And of course, when it's done right... Well. Peter Luger's has a reputation to uphold. Their meat is peerless in quality and impeccably dry-aged. Their technique is unstoppable. Steakhouses like this are a classic example of a place that knows what it does and does it well.

That being said, let's take a look at the steak.


Mmm. Man. Look at that. That's a serious medium-rare there. And see how, even though it's effectively raw in the middle there, you can see the structure of the meat fibers? It's not all chewy and sinewy. That's one of the neat effects of dry-aging - the moisture that is evaporated out of the meat leaves behind a sturdier, more easily-chewed protein structure.

Now, it is said that a man cannot survive on steak alone. (Actually, the original saying had to do with bread, but bear with me. I'm segueing.) And as much as the steak was an utter delight, the sides were just as wonderful.


We stuck to the creamed spinach (far more spinach than cream, had a wonderfully spinachy flavor and pudding-like texture) and the German fried potatoes (freshly crunchy and a flawless counterpoint to the spinach and meat). Both were, again, devastatingly simple and perfectly prepared.

And, of course, no steak dinner is complete without a bone to gnaw on.


Now, as I said, steak is a special thing. And what special thing was I celebrating tonight? Why, my dear brother's birthday. It's a time-honored tradition to embarrass the crap out of whoever's birthday it is by alerting the staff. Sure enough, at the end of our meal, we got a goofy song from the waitstaff and this honking monstrosity:


Which, by the way, was just as ridiculously sweet and delicious as it looked.

So that was that. I've officially eaten at Peter Luger. Now, I've eaten at some serious steakhouses - Dylan Prime, Gallagher's, Frankie and Johnny's - and I can honestly say that if Luger's steak was superior, it was by a marginal amount. But you don't go for the superlative. You go for the experience.


And, if you're lucky, someone else is paying.

As an addendum, I'd like to point out that I don't have anything against Outback. Hell, I've had some pretty explicit dreams about those loaded fries of theirs. Just... remember. That's a steakhouse in the same way that Olive Garden is an Italian restaurant.

Until next time, dear readers.

Happy birthday, Kuya!